Lessons From My Life…

February 3, 2012

The past 2 weeks have been extremely hectic and I realise that I have been neglecting my loyal Womb Room women and men! for which I apologise profuseley. In future I shall endeavour to maintain regular updates even during my busy periods, just because I love and appreciate you all. Which as usual brings me to my little piece of positivity for this week, month and year so far.

So as I have said, Mucho amounts of busy I have been. I have had several business meetings, Interviews (OK 1 interview) and a whole lot of emails to attend to! I carried out my very first workshop at a school in North London on Monday 30th January which was very exciting. I delivered a pupil consultation to a group of 14-15 year olds on reproductive health knowledge. It was less a workshop in order to inspire, empower and educate them and more a “recon” excercise in order to help me learn more about the ways in which young people are best engaged and taught new information and also to determine what level of knowledge they are presently at and information they already have access too. It was an interesting experience, to say the least… My class were, for the most part, very engaging, if not a little over zealous.

As they were a mixed group it was interesting to find that the boys were far more engaged and informed than the girls. I was amazed to find that the level of knowledge on what I and their teacher believed to be very basic information on gynaecologoical, reproductive and sexual health was extremely limited and arguably poor. When a 14/15 year old girl cannot explain something as basic as what happens to the female body during a period, it leaves a lot to be desired concerning the state of our education system. Nearly 90% of my class were unable to name 5 types of regular contraceptive device, and of the few pupils who provided answers, almost every one wrote ABORTION and SURGERY as a form of REGULAR CONTRACEPTIVE. Shocked much? Me too. What does it say about the quality of the sexual health education being taught in our schools when our young men and women believe that extinguishing life is a form of prevention. When our young men and women, the parents and leaders of the future believe that having unprotected sex is acceptable, with no regard for the risk of contracting STI’S, AIDS/ HIV or the risks of increasing their likelihood of cervical cancer later in life. With no consideration for the value of human life, and abortion being viewed as a solution to all and every reproductive health problem a woman may face. Are we to believe that pregnancy, the blessing of bringing new life into the world is viewed by young men and women as a burden? As an inconvenience? And much like a used condom can be tossed aside without batting an eye?

I actually found it quite disturbing the flipant attitude towards their reproductive health and their acute lack of knowledge on the subject. I assume, perhaps incorrectly, that these pupils were not yet sexually active, despite this however why aren’t they being made aware of the changes they are experiencing as they go through puberty? As parents, as teachers, family, friends why are we not making an active attempt to positively inspire our young people. Why as a community are we not educating and empowering our young people  to make positive life choices. In no way am I attempting to create a banner for teenage pregnancy among The WombRoom community but we should be encouraging our young men and women, especially those who are sexually active, to participate in safe and informed sex. The kind of sexual and reproductive practices which will reduce and hopefully even prevent the growing number of unwanted pregnancies, unnecessary diseases and undesirable long term health impacts.

I am not placing the blame for this particular group of pupils lack of knowledge on their school, but the education system in general and the family. It is not solely or primarily the job of our schools to teach our children about sexual health practices and reproductive health choices despite its foundation within the legal framework of the education system and national curriculum, the duty begins first and foremost within the home. It is the duty of families, friends, brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles to teach children and young people about these things, because it is within the home that we are first socialised. The family, for most of us, is the one community in our life which remains pretty much constant, we go back here in times of hardship, we travel here in times of celebration and joy. We love, learn and live within the construct of our families and so it is our duty to ensure we are providing the education needed in every area of life.

I could rattle on about this subject forever and a day… but alas I have been told my posts are too long, bordering on a short novella! So I shall pause here and finish with this…

 

2012 is the time to INSPIRE, EMPOWER & EDUCATE our young people. We can plan for tomorrow even if it is not promised, and in planning what we are going to munch for lunch (rhyme not intended) or what’s up tonight on our favourite soap, we need to factor in some time to teach each other. Tell a friend, a neighbour, a random passerby on the street something new, something positive and something educational. Teach them something they didn’t know before ( preferably the web address for this site www.thewombroom.com, for thos of you who cannot remember where you are) give them a little piece of reproductive positivity for the day. You never know whose life you may  be enriching, and you’ll be amazed to find the wonderful experiences people will share with you.

So go forth my minions! spread the word, spread the love and SPREAD THE REPRODUCTIVCE POSITIVITY!

Uphold the motto for 2012… INSPIRE, EMPOWER & EDUCATE!!!

 

Love You All

xxx

January 23rd 2012

Hiiiii!

I’m back…hope you are all in good health!!
After a little time out to concentrate on my studies for uni which involved large amounts of procrastination, and little pockets of self reflection. During my work-a-holic break from I have begun to explore new concepts for The WombRoom, new ideas and begun to undertake some new adventures. I have met some wonderful people in the last few weeks who have pledged their support and help and will hopefully be embarking upon an adventurous year beginning in february! Eek!
Ok so I haven’t entirely taken time out, I’ve still been maintaining a lot of work behind the scenes but in truth I never get a day off from The WombRoom because passion and conviction does not allow you to take a break, its like a constant niggling at the back of your mind and it takes over every area of your life. Even something as simple as washing up becomes adventurous as your mind begins to drift to considering all the ways you could incorporate the bubbles and soapy water into raising awareness and fertility and gynaecological problems in young women! So I have become a fully fledged perpetual thinker, never truly shutting down or switching off, sometimes even waking up at 4 am with an idea which I have to investigate before going back to sleep.
But I’m back now full time-ish (still have to maintain the uni work for another semester!) So look out for the changes that will be taking place soon starting with the website re-design very soon!!

Love you all
Xx

January 9th 2012

Me In Hospital

So I came across this photograph of me a few hours after surgery, high on the paradoxical effects of a combination of morphine, oxygen and anesthetic, and it got me thinking about several things.

1) The peculiarities of Human Nature

2) he amazing endurance of the human body and

3) The peculiarities of Human Nature

As you can probably tell most of my thinking resounded around points 1 and 3.

Whenever I see this photo of myself post surgery it always brings a smile to my face, and the distinct and unrecognizable feeling of embaressment. The onset of which brings uncomfortable, ground-swallow-me-whole-laughter, hot sweats and prolonged achey smiles, this kind that distort your entire ability to smile and look happy when maintained for too long.

This round the houses introduction brings me to my main story…Love and gratitude .

I am not too sure how common an occurrence this is but I remember in vivid detail everything from the moment I awoke from surgery. The important things though are the first 3 things I said and did.

1) I said ” mommy, I want my mom” <<<<LOVE>>>>

followed by

2) “Tell Miss …(insert Doctor’s name here which we cannot put for legal reasons) I said thank you”<<<GRATITUDE>>>

3) “I want Blu”  <<<<LOVE>>>>

The nurse who was with me told me ” there will be plenty of time for saying thank you later, right now I need to know if you’re in any pain” . To which I groaned and mumbled and tried to utter the words yes, extreme. Which was followed by a doctor administering a very strong dose of some unknown pain killer which I can only assume was morphine and me falling into a wonderfully deep sleep…

The point of my extended tale is that even in the moments when we are at our lowest ebb, Love can prevail. Love was the last thing I remember thinking about before I fell into my chemically induced sleep and love was the first thing I recognised when I woke up. It has been this love that has helped me through my entire experience so far, From the wonderful messages that people send me and the inspiring conversations I have had with women of all ages, strangers, friends, random people in the street, even some men! …every tiny piece of love that I receive I cherish. My mother and my partner at the time were the last thoughts I had before everything went black and, other than my untimely remembrance of manners, were the first thoughts I had when I woke up. It taught me that those I love and cherish the most are always at the forefront of my mind and are always the people I will put first, even before my own welfare.

I’m sure there are some skeptics among you who will be humbugging that surely the first thing on my mind was “Thank God I’m alive”… and I shall not deny that this thought did come to me but it was not the first thing I thought. I was happy to be alive but most of all I was happy to be able to see the people I loved most again.

Love is such a powerful emotion and it’s not until you are at your weakest that you even realise how important and life changing it can be. It is this realisation that brings in gratitude, often a secondary emotion but equally important. Gratitude is an essential life partner to love it brings with it true appreciation of the people and the memories that matter to you the most and it reminds you of all the reasons to carry on trying when you feel like giving up.

So in 2012 I will love 200% instead of 100% and will appreciate and be thankful for each day, each message, each memory and each individual that touches my life and my heart…

Love you all

Saschan

xxx

JANUARY 3rd 2012

So..here we are in 2012! Finally!… This is going to be a big year for The WombRoom, a monumental and life changing year for us, and the young women we are seeking to help… So I thought I’d start it with something enlightening…

You know those little moments of clarity that you have when you speak to other people…well i had one of those..tonight in fact and it went something like this… ( parts have been edited from this conversation for privacy purposes)

FRIEND: it’s awful how people shun patients when it’s their job to help them. I don’t understand why they go into that field if they decide to turn certain people away”

ME: “too much money and not enough empathy i think a lot of people lose sight of why they started out in that profession in the first place and i think for some after they’ve seen 1000 young women with sti’s because of irresponsible actions they just tar everyone with the same brush and begin to bear a grudge against all young women that they come across who they stereotype because thats easier than treating each one like an individual and seeking the proper care and treatment for her individual needs”

FRIEND: ” It’s very disheartening though, and it puts you off seeking help sometimes. The problems I’ve had are nowhere near some of the things I’ve read and seen people I know go through, but what I’ve experienced has definitely worried me with regards to actually getting the right help at the right time if anything more serious happens.”

I would like to point out that not only is it sad but it’s shocking the number of young women I meet who do not feel comfortable seeking professional medical help or are unsure how to proceed with seeking the correct medical help. Often the services that are available to young women are the exact places where young women are afraid to go for fear of prejudice and poor information.  The WombRoom was created as a safe haven for young women to express their feelings, experiences, opinions and help them through the effects of experiencing long or short term gynaecological or fertility problems but this shouldn’t be the ONLY place where young women can go to find unprejudiced information, support and advice.  Services such as The WombRoom should be common place across the country.

I do believe that after many years in the job a lot of medical professionals probably do lose sight of why they started out in women’s health, in particular those whose jobs lie within sexual health services for young women. After years and years of seeing scores of women trail in with symptoms and leave with antibiotics it must be tiring, infuriating and frustrating. Lets be honest here we’re all friends right? Almost all of us can name one friend within our circle who has had a trip to the clinic and a course of antibiotics later is recalling last weeks mistakes… we all have that friend whose sexual health practices are unorthodox to put it nicely and even if she isn’t our friend we know a girl like her. I’m not trying to say that it is these women alone who are to blame for the prejudice others incur when seeking help, but their actions go a long way to upholding the prejudice that is established and ingrained over the years.

For other professionals past personal experiences can lead them to hold uneccessary prejudice against us, although you shouldn’t take your work home or bring your home to work we are only human and inevitably it will occur. That is not to say it is right only that it is life and as such it will never be perfect.

However we shouldn’t let these experiences mar our progression. If anything they should inspire us to push for better services, seek better help and remove the prejudice we face by raising awareness about the issues we face as young women experiencing these problems. These should be the experiences which force us to push for change, to work harder for a better world. Change begins with us, it began with you when you found this page, and it will continue to grow with every woman you share this information and this site with. We cannot wait around expecting the “leaders of tomorrow” to bring solutions. WE ARE those leaders, WE ARE those pioneers, and together WE WILL be the ones who bring about change. Without taking that first step none of us can succeed. You took yours by coming here, so continue to take them with us throughout this year. Help change a life, a future, I guess i’m trying to say…help us change the world 😀 it’s ours for the taking!

love you all

xx

DECEMBER 18, 2011

I spent a relaxing weekend at home with my M.O.M (see earlier posts for pun revelation) discussing what to do next and where to go. In the process I managed to add another page full of things to my already extensive to do list! So I know this seasonal holiday and the whole of 2012 is going to packed to the rafters with exciting new endeavours and unknown occurrences which manifest themselves as they see fit.
This weekend I also received several wonderful messages from women who have visited the site and read the information and felt inspired by it. Which leads me to the purpose of this ramble. The WombRoom is specifically aimed at young women aged 16 to 29 as this age group, although wide, is one for which fertility and gynaecological treatment, information and knowledge is limited but it will take mature women who have lived, laughed and cried these experience to motivate the masses and so as your self professed leader I have compiled a Guerilla warfare survival and strategy list.

1.WORK YOUR WEAPONS> KNOWLEDGE-
Damage level- 10
Accessibility- 5
Energy level- 8
Speed- 4
I believe that this is the first step in the self proclaimed Fertility Revolution! Like guerilla warfare we must first arm ourselves with the correct weapons, we cannot win without them and knowledge is the most powerful of all. With it we ensure that our doctors decisions are not misguided and our choices are well informed. We can stop any nay sayer in their tracks and we put ourselves on the front line offence is the best defence!

2.GET SUITED & BOOTED IN ARMOUR> RESILIENCE-
Damage level- 9
Accessibility- 10
Energy- 7
Speed- 4-9
Next we must equip ourselves with the necessary safety gear in case of counter attack and so we need resilience, for all the “no I don’t think its worth doing further tests” and “we’ll discuss it at your next appointment which never comes”, we have to bite the metaphorical bullet, get back on our feet and soldier on (all puns intended) for which a resilient nature is key. We have to be able to take a few knocks and a swing a few no’s around in retaliation. So get used to saying “NO that is NOT acceptable” ” NO I would prefer another course of action” and “NO I will no longer be requiring your medical services as I wish to be referred to a specialist”. (Hear that its the sound of bruised GP ego’s everywhere crying in self pity)

3. SEEK OUT THE WEAK > CUNNING
Damage level- 10
Accessibility- 7
Energy- 5
Speed- 5
Right now you’re probably thinking… Cunning? However does that make this list?! What outrage that anyone suggest I use deviance to obtain my end goal!! Well…The chinese military philosopher general Sun Tzu advised his military officials to avoid the enemies strengths and instead attack their weakness. So here cunning and deviance come into play. Sometimes in order to get what we want from our medical proffessionals we have to be a little foxy. So find your inner beast…Go on… Grrr!

4. AIM FOR THE HEART (or the ovary) > EMOTION
Damage level- 9 (depending on the blackness of the opponents heartstrings)
Accessibility-3-6
Energy-7
Speed-9
Working tearducts? Good acting skills? If you answered yes, please proceed. If you answered no go give those crocodile tears and M.O.T and those pain faces a practice in the mirror! Sometimes, no most of the time you’ll go to an appointment or a & e and because you’re not writhing around on the floor in pain or being carried in on a stretcher by two muscly men covered in mud and blood and telling you it’ll be ok they’ll help you get through this because we never leave a man behind, you’re not taken seriously. Sometimes its necessary to target the enemies emotions and not their intellect. It’s easier to make them react than it is to make them think and pushing on the old emotional button is the quickest way to mobilize your army and your enemy. So its time to start bringing the roof down with some screams, popping a few eardrums, and starting your own aquarium with that river of tears. Less thought… More action!

5. ACTIVATE YOUR ALLIES (a.k.a getting a bad guy) > FRIENDS
Damage level-9
Accessibility-7
Energy-4
Speed-4
Not feeling too strong? Not yet loaded up with 22. Calibre steely determination? No worries… Time to call in reinforcements. Sometimes we can march into an appointment fully equipped for battle but the moment we’re sitting in that chair facing the enemy we seem to turn to jelly saying “yes sir” “no sir” “3 bags full”. Well this is a war! And you are soldiers! So reach inside and find a pair (of ovaries) and if you haven’t got two then borrow some! Take a friend or family member along who will ask questions in case you freeze on the front line. Not only will they provide you with the moral support you need but also the energy and bravery to ask all of those niggling questions you have concerning your health… I know there’s a list as long as your arm!

6.WIN THE WAR OF WORDS > DEFINITION
Damage level-8
Accessibility-6
Energy-7
Speed-5-8
Feeling fired up? Good! It is important to define the issues you are facing before the issues define you. Following diagnosis or pre- appointment define the issues and where YOU want to go next before your opponents (the doctor and the condition) define it for you. Its the age old debate “Freedom fighter” Vs. ” Fundamental terrorist” one is defined by the individual the other is defined by “the state”. DEFINE DON’T BE DEFINED!

7.BE VIGILANT > AWARENESS
Damage level-10
Accessibility-8
Energy-7
Speed-5
Che Guevara said guerilla warfare meant eternal vigilance and as I said before… This is war. It’s imperative that you remain vigilant and keep a record of the symptoms you have, their frequency and any changes in you lifestyle or diet which may make them better or worse. You can use this information to strengthen your case for better medical care and treatment and to improve your chances of early diagnosis if you are still unsure what the problem may be.

8.HIT THEM WITH HUMOUR > LAUGHTER
Damage level- 9
Accessibility- 5
Energy- 7
Speed- 5
Sometime laughter really is the best medicine. The first time I went to my hospital appointment following my scan I laughed. A lot. When she told me it could be cancer… I laughed. When she said it would require surgery… I laughed and when she said I’d need more tests… I laughed some more… seems a bit inappropriate doesn’t it? Cancer isn’t funny I hear your gasp in unamusement… Well no it isn’t all that haha! But if you don’t laugh you’ll cry and sometimes you laugh then cry or cry and then laugh but whichever way you do it laugh then laugh some more… Tell a few jokes… Ease the tension and bring through some relief. Because just as hard as it may be for you to hear the news it’s hard for the doctor to have to tell you particularly when it’s bad. I actively encourage humour it helps us get through… There’s no room for wallowing in warfare… High spirits and high hopes that’s what we like around here soldier!!!

9. AROUSING & ORGANISING > FORCE
Damage level-10
Accessibility-10
Energy-10
Speed-5
One of the chief tactics of Guerilla warfare is to educate the masses of down trodden people, thus arousing their interest and organising their mobilisation. By educating those around you and repeatedly whispering (or shouting) The WombRoom in their ear you could help save another woman’s fertility or life. Tell your mother, daughter, aunt sister, brother, uncle, grandad (yes men too!) One day they will have daughter or grandaughter and it’s important that they are aware and prepared for the active responsibility of reproductive health. War is like a dance…Think it takes two too tango… Try making a baby…

10. DON’T UNDERESTIMATE DETERMINATION > STRENGTH
Damage level-10
Accessibility-8
Energy-8
Speed-2
Never underestimate the importance of determination! It can make or break you. Guerilla War isn’t about short term victory its about long term gain and that takes endurance and determination. You have to prepared for the fight and anything it throws your way. When you march into battle it’s for the long run so keep those spirits high!

DECEMBER 10, 2011

Today has been a good day!

For me today marked the start of something new. A new outlook on life, something new to strive for. A new goal to reach, and all in 2012. I met with my funding development manager to discuss some ideas for The WombRoom and where we can go from here. We generated a lot of ideas and with a lot of help from my M.O.M (Manager Of Marketing, who is actually my mother!) we’ve managed to come up with some groundbreaking and inspirational campaigns to run next year to help raise awareness and generate a service which will help young women across the country. So in 2012  look out for us…we’ll be on a high street near you…at a university, college, school near you… at hospital near you, at a fashion show near you, at a home near you…The moral of the story is, in 2012 The WombRoom will be like rats and spiders, never more than 10 ft and a few clicks away… So spread the word and put the kettle on we’ll be wanting tea and biscuits when we arrive!

Love you All

xx

DECEMBER 7, 2011

Yesterday was a bad day, certainly not one of my finer moments. I’ve been experiencing really bad pain in my ovary and pelvic area for the past few days and yesterday it culminated in a trip to A&E at the women’s hospital. The doctor didn’t say much, as was to be expected, she mostly told me to go home and work on my pain management until the date of my next scan and in the meantime try to see if I could get an earlier appointment time. I was not at all surprised by this but sometimes even though you know going to the hospital is going to a pointless exercise it is necessary. It’s important because each time you take a trip to A&E it is recorded and in the long run will only give you more leverage when it comes to bargaining with medical professionals on treatment for your condition.

That’s funny isn’t it? The fact that we have to bargain with the people who swear an oath to help preserve life and health, like a middle eastern bazaar. We aren’t just given the help and care we need willingly, instead we have to barter, “I’ll stop coming into A&E if you give me an appointment with a specialist” or ” another scan, another scan for the pretty lady…it’ll cost you 3 months waiting time…”  Aaahh the NHS is a peculiar service, but I suppose it a service which mirrors the truth of reality. For whatever we want in life we must fight, those who are not prepared for battle will surely fall by the wayside, and those who are will never be guaranteed a victory but their determination is often enough to keep them going and eventually get results. I hope all of you who check this website, who share it with you’re family and friends are the fighters, even if you are not right now, you are on your journey to becoming a crusader for your cause, a missionary of change for not just yourself but for women everywhere. And if you’re sitting there thinking i’m not prepared for such an epic  struggle or you’re more a “make love not war” type of person well i say to you….You made the first step right? You came here…

Alas I digress, I actually cam here to to let you all know that today I received a very important phone call. The WombRoom has been awarded £3000 by the wonderful people at Live Unltd, and in particular Sarah Brent who managed my funding application and has been a wealth of help and information, who have agreed to give us the money to set in motion many of the elaborate plans which my mind has conjured up! So tonight ladies…have a toast to The WombRoom, to your fertility, to your health but most important of all to hope and love….there’s going to be an awful lot of it working its way around the country in 2012!!!

MWAH!

DECEMBER 1, 2011

Further events in my tumultuous week!!!… So now there is speculation that I may be going into an early menopause…even more trials and tribulations to add to my, never boring for a minute, existence.  I have to have blood tests tomorrow morning after which i will wait two weeks to discover the results.

After experiencing; Hot sweats, Lack of sleep, Irritability, Mood Swings, Panic attacks, Fatigue, Night sweats, Loss of concentration  Loss of memory, and Rapid weight loss on top of my continued abdominal pain, I think it is safe to say that my Left ovary has decided to get political. It’s like the Gaza strip inside my abdomen right now and my ovary is Israel, holding all the cards, retaining all the power and using its superpower allies (hormones) to wage continual war on my reproductive system and majority of my life!

All I can say is thank God for my GP she is a wonderful woman she has been there to support me throughout this whole ordeal and I can always rely on her to listen to whatever medical problems I have, safe in the knowledge that she will take me seriously and suggest what is best in order to move on from whatever point I am at.

So Thank you to all the wonderful GP’s out there who take their patients seriously!

22/11/2011

I went to the hospital today. Before I went in I had made up my mind that I was not leaving until I had been given what I deemed to be satisfactory answers and decision, and when I sat down I was pleasantly surprised. I have not come across many medical professionals who are considerate, and non- judgmental and willing to listen to what I have to say but the few who I do meet continue to amaze me. After speaking to the doctor she decided that the best course of action to take would be to undergo another scan to see if the cyst which is now growing on my remaining ovary has grown or regressed. If it has grown then we will discuss options for surgery to prevent a re-occurrence of last time! And if it has regressed then we will discuss surgery to explore why I am still experiencing so much pain. Although the last thing I wanted to do was undergo further surgery I hope this will provide the answers I have been looking for and I plan to only take positive emotions away from this experience.

I am not a religious person but I am spiritual and I try not to question why this has been my portion so far, but for every hardship that we endure I truly believe that God will provide us with blessing in abundance. Everything happens for a reason and this past year has solidified my belief in that.

In December 2010 I had a coil fitted, for all the pain it caused it was a blessing in disguise because without it I would never have known about the cysts that had set up home in my ovary, the teratoma could have gone unnoticed for many more months giving it time to develop aggressive cancerous cells, and by the time it was discovered it may have been too late. So I stand firm in my belief that everything happens for a reason, even if that reason is not apparent at first.

I do not believe that everything within our lives is predestined, we are free to make choices and then experience the culmination of those decisions, however I do believe there is a plan for our lives. I am not sure what the plan for my life is entirely, but I believe that whatever it is it has bought me too this point. A considerable portion of my life plan must be to help other people and in setting up this service I am fulfilling a part of that, I believe it was predestined for me.

Everything I have experienced has bought me to this point, to this website, writing this post, on this day, reaching out to as many people as possible one publication at a time. And in doing so this time I am prepared for whatever happens next, this time round I have a battle plan.

So…Come on life, let’s have ya!

21/11/2011

Another relaxing weekend away…well kind of relaxing… I spent this weekend visiting friends in London and what was supposed to be a wonderful weekend away removing myself from the everyday turmoil of life and a dodgy ovary, transformed into a weekend of theological and philosophical discovery.

I spent Saturday with a very good friend of mine, throughout most of which we discussed everything from the meaning of life to the whether God exists and the purpose of good and evil. He gave me a lot to think about! However the turning point of my weekend came when he asked…

“During everything you’ve been going through have you ever asked why me? Why did this have to happen to me?”

To which I replied earnestly, No.

He asked me why I had never asked that as most people would have at some point.

I told him that I never asked “Why me?” because Why not me? What is so special about me that it shouldn’t have happened? What is so great about me that it should have been somebody else?

Quite simply the answer is nothing. There is nothing so fantastic and awe-inspiring about me that makes me any more worthy to live a life free of pain and turmoil than the next woman.  The real question is “Why anybody?” why should any one be subject to these ordeals in life?…. Alas some things we shall never know the answer too. The trials that we face in life become a part of us, they can make or break us and will always bring us to a fork in the road. We may choose to follow a path which will bear fruit and help us prosper, growing stronger, emanating positivity and radiating love and new found knowledge or we can choose to wallow in self pity, despair at our torment and lament to a song of woe singing “Why me?”

13/11/2011

I have been thinking a lot the past few days about the responses I have been getting in relation to the site, Firstly I would just like to thank everyone who has come here and had a look around and in particular those people who have left positive and inspirational messages of support and have recommended the site to a friend. It really means a lot to me to know that I have the support of people who I don’t even know and it reassures me that what I am doing is going to eventually reach out to all those young women who need its support, information and advice.

Moving on…One of the most common responses I have received is that people are amazed that I am trying to turn my negative experience into something positive. It took me many months to actually start The WombRoom from the date of its initial conception in my kitchen at home over a cup of peppermint tea (post surgery)with my mom (to whom the fabulous name is credited).  I was really only kick started into setting up the site when I received confirmation from the hospital in October that there was a problem with my remaining ovary. That was the catalyst which sparked the beginning of my fertility revolution, as I am choosing to name it. I suppose for me the deciding factor was that I could continue to wallow in the bottomless pit of emotional and psychological turmoil that was becoming an everyday occurrence or I could use that negative emotion to found something inherently good and positive to help other young women in similar situations.

It has not been a particularly easy year for me but starting The WombRoom has been the highlight of my year so far. In many ways it has provided me with the confidence boost I needed to discuss how I was feeling, and for the most part still am. This has been my space for personal therapy even though I haven’t written that much about myself to date. It has provided me with the outlet I needed to begin to come to terms with the severity of my surgery and what the future may hold. I cannot predict what lies in store and I no longer wish to part take in negative speculation about what the future may hold for my reproductive health.  I just hope I can make a positive change to some other young woman’s thinking about her reproductive health.

I want The WombRoom to become a motivator for social change and radical policy research on reproductive services for young women across the country, lobbying the government for change and a call to action. Sparking the desire to pursue fertility research for the age group 16 to 29, providing the education in schools and colleges across the country that is needed to allow women the foresight to take stock of their reproductive health choices and acknowledge the risks involved in waiting too long to have children.

I hope that The WombRoom will be the start of something special, a cataclysmic force of education and action that will inspire young women throughout the nation and I hope that you will all be there to witness this revolution of reproductive change in 21st century Britain!

7/11/2011

This weekend I visited a spa and had a full body aromatherapy massage. First of all I would like to say it was absolutely amazing!!! and i would recommend anyone to go and have one especially if you are feeling stressed out and need to relax.

However the moral of this story is that the massage taught me some  new things about the way my body is working post surgery. The wonderful young woman who performed my massage shared with me that she cannot have children, and I was shocked to see how many women I have come across since setting up The WombRoom who are actually affected by infertility and gynaecological problems. The young woman told me that there are little lumps in my back which are a by product of my remaining ovary working too hard and pumping too many hormones into the body!!! I thought it was so amazing what you can learn from something so simple!! and i think that also answers the question WHY AM I SO EMOTIONAL ALL THE TIME LATELY???

So aside from a weekend of fun, relaxation and shopping with my wonderful friends It also became a weekend of learning, acceptance and understanding in many ways. It has made me even more determined to reach out to the women who need this service the most. The worst part of dealing with problems concerning your reproductive health is that you are often alone with no one to talk to.

In a society dominated by men for millions of years as women we have been forced to keep “women’s problems” to ourselves like a dirty secret we have swept them under the carpet and only addressed them in those silent moments when we are alone and we can no longer run or hide from how we are feeling. For years our silent tears and reflective moments have been our only forum to express how we are really feeling inside and for most of us the only place we really have to let out how we feel is in our minds, with ourselves for fear that no one else will understand, or should bear the burden of our emotional and psychological turmoil.

I think The WombRoom is going to be the start of something new… a place where you can come and share how you’re feeling without fear, without judgement and without a care in the world for how long you cry or what it is over. So come and share how you’re feeling it might just be the beginning of  the healing your body, mind and soul needs. And finally go get yourselves a full body massage, you deserve it now more than ever :D

Love you All

Comments

  1. Just killing some in between class time on Digg and I discovered your article . Not normally what I prefer to read about, nevertheless it was completely price my time. Thanks.

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